Wednesday, November 14, 2012

Being the "Fat Girl" at the gym and everywhere.

Most Chubby Girls out there know what it's like to be the "Fat girl" at one time or another, you know the girl people make assumptions about because of her weight, the girl people assume doesn't have ambition, drive or determination because she's over a size 12? It's extrememly difficult to be the largest person in the room most of the time, not because I hate myself or my body (My body and I are going through some things but we like each other) but because so many people have already decided who I am before I've said a word.

Today at the gym a well meaning skinnyland citizen- she couldn't have been more than 95 pounds came up to me after my grueling 45 min elliptical workout, I was sweating like a lady of the night in a baptist church I tell you. So this little person bounces up to me and says "You're doing so great! You're new right? I'm _______. Don't worry as you keep doing it you'll be able to go for at least 10 minutes next time!" .....Confusion and then anger set in as I realized Ms. Bouncy had seen my cool down and assumed that I'd given up after 5 minutes. Sheesh.

To her credit she did seem genuinely happy for me; because I'm a Big girl (capital B) I let it go, there was no use in correcting her. But even though her intentions were good, she was trying to motivate me and maybe even befriend me she failed to realize that her peceptions about me as a person were far from reality. I'm 5 feet tall, 306 pounds and carry most of my weight in my lower mid section and thighs but I could check a 250 pound man into a wall due to my low center of gravity and the fact that I do have some impressive muscle mass for someone my size. She didn't see a person capable of achieving great things, someone who has failed at weight loss a million times but refuses to give up, someone who is uncompromisingly loyal to friends and family.

She didn't see any of that, which is why it's so important that when you meet a Ms. Bouncy, whether at the gym, on the job or even an employer you remember that just because they can't see your dedication, education, skills or determination doesn't mean you can't. No matter what it is, a new job, weight loss, fitness etc.; remember that your weight does not define you, it does not hold you back, people will tell you that it does, and to the superfacial, the annoying and the billion dollar diet industry it does but fuck them. To every "Fat Girl" out there, screw skinny be healthy.
-Love
CGINTW

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