Sunday, November 11, 2012

Bad Dates-How to handle them, how to avoid them

***I know I promised a video post this week however due to technical difficulties (editing software issues, it will be delayed but worth it)

I recently heard a horror story from a dear friend of mine about a really bad first date. Apparently the suitor in question invited her to partake in some illicit smoke sport ( I'm not judging but here's your first hint of trouble) and then made her drive an hour and half to his house in order to partake (not very gentlemanly). It only gets worse my friends; he then proceeds to make vulgar and not so romantic advances regarding her ample bosom. (Ok so I really just wanted to write "ample bosom")

Needless to say she was disappointed with the entire experience and rightfully so, here are my five tips for avoiding what I call "bottom of the barrel dating":

1.) Avoid those people whose idea of a good time is illicit drugs, too much alcohol or strip clubs.  Now if these are your interests then go for it but if not avoid people who fall into the "obsessed " category with any of the above things.

2.) Make sure that the person who has asked you to give up your time and energy is someone who
will respect that expenditure of said time and energy. You want someone who will plan out the date, someone who will make time for you and treat you live the unbelievable goddess you are.

3.) Always keep a back up plan, if someone somehow manages to get through your radar and you end up having to hear all bout his exe's cat always have a couple exit strategies ready, always make sure it's something plausible not not necessarily verifiable. Here are some example's

"Jeez you know I'd love to drive you and your friends around because you drank too much but I just got a text that my sister needs an emergency babysitter so sorry, nice to see meet you."

"I'm sorry my boss just texted that she needs some presentation materials like yesterday, I'll call you." -This one is best used on the "too clingy too soon guy"

and my personal favorite, the truth-reserved only for the douchest of douche bags

"I think it's totally great that you have such a good relationship with yourself that you don't even need to feign interest in anyone else, in fact I suggest that you keep your current relationship paradigm and  I wish you all the happiness in the world but I have to go.

4.) Please do not agree to go out with someone just because you're bored, lonely or feeling a little desperate. Remember that you are beautiful, strong, intelligent, ambitious and deserve someone who will work for your attention, someone who has their life together because I mean who really wants to date the dude he always has to borrow rent money? Come on. It's very hard in our society to hold out for Mr. Right especially when Mr. Right Now is lurking in every bar, now we all have a few lurkers in our relationship closet and that's ok just remember the point of a one night stand is to get it out of your system and move on to greener pastures. DO NOT mistake an intimate encounter with an connection of intimacy.

5.)When navigating the dating world the number one thing I learned is that timing is everything thing. Don't waste your time with someone who isn't worth the paper their number is written on because you never know when Mr. Right is going to walk through the door and you wouldn't want to miss him because you were too busy with some yahoo who just happened to be around.

Love to all the single ladies out there, please remember how fabulous you are.
-CGINTW

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