Skip to main content

According to me you don't matter any more

This is not for you, the one who hurt me, betrayed me, beat down my soul, no this is for me, this is for the anger, the pain, the sorrow you've caused, it is the requiem of all of those things for after this, I will leave them and never think of them or you again. I've spent so much time in darkness, so much time wasted believing you, all the horrible things you told me, all the time wishing I could make you better, hoping some how we would get through it. I did nothing to deserve the torture you meted out, and loved you, trusted you even though you gave me no cause or reason to do either.

After the bruises healed, and the doctors told me my injuries were "relatively minor" I took me and my broken ribs home, I looked around at the wreckage that had become my life with you. I decided that it had been enough, that I had given enough to you. I left everything, wanted nothing from you and like always that is exactly what I received, you never once even tried to find out if I was okay, though I knew you wouldn't it still came as a shock. I had truly believed that you loved me and just didn't know how to show it, I had believed the lies you'd told me, the truth was like an icy cold shower, sudden, and heart stopping.

I cried for weeks, sometimes for no apparent reason at all. At first I thought it was because I missed what I thought I'd had. Slowly I began to realize that I was crying for the me who had lost her way, I had become someone unrecognizable to myself. I wasn't the happy, determined girl who left home, I looked beaten down, defeated and just plain sad. A couple of times, the pain was just too much and it was so easy to take one more drink, take one more pill and to know it would all disappear. Luckily I have people in my life who care too much about me to let me end up like you. Your story is truly a sad one and though you've endured many unfortunate circumstances yourself, you have yet to learn how to overcome them.

But this is not for you, this is for me and for anyone else who the story sounds all too familiar. It is something we don't talk about in "polite" society. This for anyone who has ever been hurt, mistreated, abused or other wise emotionally malnourished by someone. Today is the day, you say good bye to all those bad thoughts, to all the insults, to all the negative talk, today is the day we let go and drop it by the way side, it was never ours to carry and it is time we gave it back. I've started an entirely new life, with new love and old friends and I don't miss you at all. In fact, you are nothing but a foot note in my story.
Here's to new beginnings,
CGITW

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Sunday Style Guide and Giveaway! March 24th 2019

Hellooo Lovelies! This week we are talking all about Spring time plus size fashion, come look at all the beautiful things blooming at #Unique-Vintage dresses, swimsuits, #torrid accessories  and #sierrablufashion who provided the dress for my giveaway this week! Click on the Rafflecopter link to enter and make sure to follow all the instructions! XOXO, CGINTW

To Enter the Giveaway click the link below!
http://www.rafflecopter.com/rafl/display/04ecbf3d1/?

 Linke to everything in video below!
Pink and Blue Stripe bikini: https://www.unique-vintage.com/products/unique-vintage-plus-size-1950s-style-pink-blue-stripe-bow-dee-dee-swim-top
Folter Red and Navy Plaid boatneck https://www.unique-vintage.com/products/folter-plus-size-1950s-style-red-navy-plaid-boatneck-top
Green and Ivory Banana Leaf print dress https://www.unique-vintage.com/products/collectif-plus-size-1950s-green-ivory-banana-leaf-print-jade-swing-dress
Teal Palm Print Kelly Faux Wrap Dress https://www.unique-vintage.com/products/c…

Flaunt your stuff with plus size lingerie

Don't let your size determine your style
I know how hard it is to be reminded every day and every time you go shopping that you are not "normal" sized. Everything from t-shirts to skirts to skiivies must be purchased at a "specialty" store which is what the snarky lady behind the "normal" store counter always tells you when you ask if they have plus sizes knowing that the odds are against you. Trying to find sexy lingerie or even cute undies is always a chore, so I've done some field work for you and I found some well made, not too expensive styles which come in up to a size 6x (warning, 6x in lingerie world means 26/28 dress size) Without further ado, the latest from Hips and Curves.com., who were featured in the famous Vogue Italia cover with plus size models.





Don't let your size determine your style or your life, you are sexy, confident and oh so amazing, and not even the snarky lady can change that. Remeber that your size doesn't …

How to Spend $0 Trying New Trends